Alas Poor Icarus
"Full Public Disclosure" is usually performed in person. There are rare instances of Full Public Disclosure being performed on someone else's behalf, as in this fine story written by our desert pal Kurtis. I should also point out that in spite of my protestations to shoot your TV, if we hadn't wasted untold hours in front of it, we would never have memorized the theme music to the "Beverly Hillbillies"...
Alas, poor Icarus. He flew too close to The Sun. As did Duncan, Jay and Sally on the wings of Honda.
Now there is another rider that has joined the "Icarus Club".
Yup,... Al.
Pigs don't fly.
(To the theme music from "The Beverly Hillbillies")
Let me tell you all a story about a man named Al
He was riding on his bike and things were really swell
Then he got to cruising down this really nice dike
The next thing you know, he's no longer on his bike
Crash, you say. Bad crash.
We'd been riding all the trails and climbing all the hills
Everything was fine, nobody taking spills
Then we got complacent when heading for the truck
That was the point at which Al was really fucked
Dust, I saw. Lots of it.
Heading down the dike and things were really fine
Looking out ahead, picking out a line
Engine was a-screamin', and Al was in the zone
Luckily for him, he didn't break a bone.
Contusions. And some scrapes.
I rode to the abyss and yelled, "Are you OK?"
He replied "Yup", and the scene I did survey
I headed on down to help him extricate
His body from the bike because of his mistake
Groans, I heard. And cussing, lots of it.
As I scrambled down to help I checked out the whole scene
Al was on the ground and the bike was pinning him
Underneath its weight, caressing him with care
It was grinding sticker bushes into his underwear
Stickers. Russian Thistle.
I got the bike up off him and set it on the stand
He struggled to his feet and limped like an old man
Cussin' and a spittin' he made up no excuse
He flew too close to the sun, just like Icarus
Pain. But not too much of it.
So now he's made it home and Julie rolls her eyes
"I don't know, what's with it with you guys?
Riding and a-crashing at almost every turn
You'd think at your age that you would finally learn"
Wives. Kind hearted. Compassionate.
Well, that's about the end to this story that I tell
Al's doing fine but his knee is not so swell
The good news is that his body's on the mend
His waiting for the desert trip and shit from all his friends.
He's fine. But pigs can't fly.
It will be worth it in the end.
Wright Cyclone in full song.